Monthly Archives: September 2009

I'd like to know where the money comes from. Really I'd just like to know how people my age are putting offers on houses. What kinds of jobs are people getting right now that allow for house buying and traveling and all kinds of other annoying Facebook status updates? Where is it coming from and, more importantly, how can I get me some of that? I mean, I work just as hard as the next guy. In fact, I went to college, threw down a pretty penny, got a degree, yet here I am. Watching people my age buying houses.

I believe the time has come for drastic measures.

Maybe I could just get hit by a car at a crosswalk.

Or maybe I could move to Idaho and try my luck with the lottery.

I could work for these guys...

I could turn into Nancy Botwin?

I could just pull a massive casino heist...

Or maybe learning to count cards would be easier.

Maybe I could change my name to Blanket and sneak into the Jackson family. Or I could cut my hair like this, pop out 8 kids, get rich off their exploitation, then embark in a highly publicized divorce.

At this point, any of these options are probably more feasible than me getting rich. I think I'll take the Nancy Botwin route. Sans Guillermo, though.

Well, kids, I'm back from my blogging sabbatical. It wasn't so much a sabbatical as it was a....I hate blogging, and I need a break type of thing. But I'm back. I'm a writer by nature, but because I sit on my bum bum all day and write really boring manuals and corporate communications deliverables that use the word bum bum, I need an outlet. A written word outlet. Not that anyone reads it, but, that's not really why you blog. So whatever. I'm back, and that is all.

So where have I been the past couple of months? At home, practically jobless with two jobs, and still trying to figure out how that works. Let me know if you figure it out.

Last time we spoke, I was working as a legal assistant. Well, turns out the legal world is a cruel, cruel joke, and I wanted nothing to do with it. So I took the lesson learned and got another job as a tech writer/semi graphic designer for an information design company. It started out well and has now degenerated into 10 meager hours a week and a lot of angst towards corporate America. I also write a lot of really boring blogs for a radiant heating company. If you ever need to be sold on why you should revolutionize your life with radiant heating, let me know. I can write a blog just for you all about it. You know you want it.

We also moved out of the nasty cubby also known as our basement apartment. We upgraded to some swanky apartments smack dab in the middle of Sugarhouse. We love it more than we love most things and spend a lot of time watching really bad tv on our poop green couch. Since this is the first apartment we've really loved, I've spent a lot of time decorating it. See the following:

After we moved, we fled to Seattle for a much needed break from jobs. It was pretty much the best trip ever.

We gave the space needle a thumbs up. But really it was a thumbs down because it was a little overrated. Oh well.

Mitch saw some bears and got scared.
And we rode on a boat.

Besides Seattle, we also made our way to Boise to party hardy with our good friend B. Samp and celebrate his wedding. It was a good time.

We slow danced to Billy Joel.

And we partied at the Boise temple, which was actually surprisingly pretty.

We also celebrated Mitch's big 22nd bday with a GTI cake. Don't laugh at it. I tried really hard, and it tasted good, so whatever.

If you look at his shirt, you'll see what the cake was SUPPOSED to look like. I just want to be like Ace of Cakes ok? Leave me alone.

Other than that, we've just been livin' the dream, being married, and loving life. Semi-unemployment is definitely a drag, but I'll get through it. If you know of a good graphic design job, let me know. Although I'm sure you don't because there aren't any out there.

With so much time on my hands, I'll probably be re-entering the blogging world with a vengeance, so get ready to LIVE. But not really. But sort of.

And srsly...Hell's Kitchen tonight? Suzanne?! REALLY Chef Ramsey? zomg.